The gentle chug-chug-chug of a steam train is enough to send anyone into a gentle slumber. It's the reason I'd always miss my stop. But doesn't this sedative quality make a train carriage the perfect place for a hotel?
Heck yes! And the Hoste Arms in Burnham Market, Norfolk, have done just that. While their main hotel is the heart of the village, Railway House is all cosy and secluded on the outskirts on the site of an old railway station. It ceased business in 1957 and now it's probably the coolest place to sleep ever.
The main part of the station has seven bedrooms and a lounge area for guests, but the really special part is the railway carriage room. It's actually on the tracks. It's quirky, it's luxurious, it's gorgeous and YOU GET TO SLEEP IN A TRAIN.
Prices start from £80 per person per night for this room plus a full English breakfast (it's £55 per person per night for the other seven rooms), and you do have to take a scenic 10 minute walk through the village to get breakfast from the hotel in the morning.
Slightly closer by (just over the village green from the hotel, in fact) is the Hoste's Vine House boutique hotel. Each room is individually designed and packed full of Georgian opulence.
The standout rooms are the Deluxe range - I'd begin to ideas above my station after a night in this place. I mean, just look at the bath - it has its own chandelier:
Prices start from £110 per person per night, brekkie included.
The restaurant in the main Hoste Arms hotel is also seriously special (their fillet of beef was so tender it made me make embarrassing scoffy noises, and I could have easily polished off the assiette of seafood starter for two by myself) plus their wine list is absolutely massive and all kinds of wonderful. It's a good job Vine House is within perfect stumbling distance.