STOP EVERYTHING: I have found the best thing on the internet, so we can all just give up now, and make biscuits covered in ROBOTS instead. Because LOOK.
When Polish designer Zuzia Kozerska got her hands on a laser cutter, she decided to try engraving wooden rolling pins, made from local beech wood. And lo, her range of embossing rolling pins was born. Let's explore some of her other designs...
This dinosaur design might be my favourite. I want to cover every biscuit, every cake, every piece of pasta with Diplodocus and chums. Hell, I want to cover my FACE with them. No? Okay, no.
I like this subtle design - at first glance it just looks like a nice wavy pattern, and then you realise it's lots of lovely foxes. How foxing. And foxy.
I'm starting to wonder if Zuzia is in fact one of Team Sluttery working undercover in the forests of Poland. Robots. Dinosaurs. Foxes. AND NOW CATS. The only thing that's missing, really, is unicorns. I think it's only a matter of time.
The cat pin was Zuzia's first design - she made it for her niece who loves cats, BRILLIANT AUNTIE KLAXON - and it has a teeny-tiny surprise hiding among those moggies...
... a mouse! Really bloody cute.
Would you like fries with that biscuit? YES PLEASE.
Zuzia can knock you up a beautiful personalised rolling pin, too. Choose from a star or heart pattern, and go for phrases like "made by..." or "baked by..." OR - excitement - your own custom text. The possibilities are infinite. I'm unsure yet whether swears are allowed.
Valek rolling pins are £24.41 each, plus £6.51 shipping to the UK (there won't be any duty or taxes to pay), except for the personalised pins, which are £32.55. That's pretty damn reasonable for something that's handmade with so much care. One of these would make a brilliant present for the baker in your life, and the personalised ones especially would be great gifts for a special occasion.
Which design would you choose?